Russian Roulette

This is one of my poems from the darkest point in my life before i got control of myself. Don't worry about me nowadays i have too many good things going for me. Its all starting to turn around. I just feel like i need to get this poem off my chest to finnaly abandon all my regret about this point in my life. without this point in my life i wouldnt be who i am i would probably have ended up being less of a success had i continued following that path anyways. Just to let you all know ive redone this poem so its better than it was when i first wrote it and here it is... Russian Roulette.

I load the bullet..
A single cartridge..
So small..
Seemingly weak..
Yet its power enough to take down a giant..
Breaking bone and tearing flesh..
I close my eyes and spin the cylinder..
The barrel to my temple..
My finger on the trigger..
The last thing i hear..
Click..
Click..
Boom..

Again this is the most disturbing and dark you will ever see from me again. I found the courage to seek help at this point in my life and i will have the courage to seek it again should i ever become this self loathing again. I refuse to go back into that pit. I finnaly got the hell out of there i still have a "fuck the world, and fuck you too" attitude at times but i will never ever go out that way. If you have any concerns for me dont worry ive been reborn.